Green Shell 100ml - armco/crash-barrier repellent anti-magnetic car wax - OFFER

OK, time to fess up, peeps. This was an April Fool's day wax back in April 2017. It won't repel armco though. Sorry. We did have a proper armco-repellent recipe but a local bodyshop threatened to kneecap MrSkittles and we couldn't have that. He can't fly, so being unable to walk would be terrible.

Here's the original description:

"After years of development, a unique formulation has been created by 'RF-Andy', our head chemist, that blends high-quality, handmade car wax with a proprietary anti-magnetic compound. Once applied to a vehicle it works to repel the metal crash barriers ('armco') that surround race tracks and roads worldwide.

In testing, Green Shell has been independently proven to reduce 'armco rash' by up to 87.46%. Although primarily developed for armco, the wax has also proven effective during testing in reducing road traffic collisions, with vehicles being an estimated 46.92% less likely to suffer bodywork damage.

Use three coats of Green Shell to maximise protection and for medium sized or medium speed collisions. One to two coats will only help guard against minor car park altercations or low speed impacts.

Simply apply with a wax applicator, allow to cure for 5-10 minutes, and the buff off. You may never have to visit a bodyshop again*.

The graph on the second slide shows the magnetic repulsion of objects colliding with a waxed surface (in metric tons) vs the speed of collision (in metres per second).

*Warning - may not work with carbonfibre or Glass Reinforced Plastic (GRP) vehicles.

As approved by BridgetoGantry.com - the leading website for the world's most armco-est racetrack!"